A Stand Against Myself

So, as a lot of you know, I used to work in film and television. It sounds exciting and I am not going to lie, it was - sometimes. But it was also very, very, very time consuming. And when you were contracted to a film it meant 12 hour days, 6 days a week. And that was if you were putting in the minimum. Not to mention when you had to travel to a location or *gulp* be away on location for 6 plus weeks. Needless to say, that life style is less than ideal to my personal mothering expectations.

However, occasionally I take a freelance gig such as a wedding or a promo video for a company, etc. This has turned out to NOT be a good idea. I honestly feel that people have absolutely no idea how much time, energy, etc. goes into editing and producing the final product. This is not something you can do during your toddler's 1.5 hour nap and it is DEFINITELY not something that can be done while they are awake. So I work when Kyle is home and he can watch our daughter, but then I am totally cut off from them. I work when my mother can come over and "nanny" but she can only do that so often. I feel like I can never get a leg up on the projects. It is stressful and frustrating and I am not going to do it again for at least year. And I am definitely not doing it for my current rates. I am way underpaid for the amount of time I have to put into this stuff.

The problem isn't the work. I don't mind working. The problem is that I don't have TIME to work. I am suppose to be a SAHM but then I am trying to fit in a work load that takes more than 40 hours a week for several weeks on top of mom duty. That doesn't add up. 

And the freelance stuff has none of the fun and excitement that being on a movie set does, so I am not even getting THAT back from it.

*pout*

So, enough with the grumpiness, but THAT is why I have no time to blog. I have literally buried myself in finishing up the last two contracts I have (One Wedding =DONE! and One Convention Promo = Half way Done) because I am OVER THEM. And then I have no stupid project weighing me down. I want that weight lifted OFF of my shoulders. I want to spend Sophie's nap time (my only free time until the Mr. gets home) mapping out the new baby's nursery or blogging or vlogging or reading or eating lunch or napping. (I am pregnant, after all!).

I guess by writing about this, I feel like I have taken a stand. Against what? Myself, I suppose, b/c I am the one who takes the jobs. Lesson learned. Being a mom wins.

=)

Now for a stroll down film making memory lane...


lv, CH